Refining Ourselves— The Attitudes [1]

The Action Attitudes —Cynic and Realist
There are seven attitudes— I'll profile them here according to their Centers.

Our Attitude is our primary life-outlook. It colors how we perceive the world and our place in it. It influences how we respond to life. Though primarily an intellectual perspective, it affects how we respond emotionally, as well, and what we are most likely to do in response to our perceptions.

Having a ‘good’ attitude is as important as everyone says it is. Your life will actually go more smoothly if you stay in your positive pole than if you move into the negative pole of your Attitude [just as happens with the other overleaves— in fact, the Attitude affects your outcomes more often than your other overleaves do.] And being in the positive pole of your Attitude will help you stay in the positive pole of your other Overleaves, as well.

The truth is, though, it is inherently easier for people with the Spiritualist and the Idealist Attitudes to stay upbeat and positive than it is for the Cynics and Skeptics to do. But, Michael reminds us, we all choose our Overleaves for a purpose— so, what is important is to stay, as much as we can, in the positive pole of our own Attitude, come what may.
Besides, being an Idealist isn’t perfect, anyhow. They have a tendency to put on blinders and be naïve.

It’s easier than with the other Overleaves to ‘borrow’ from the other Attitudes. So, someone in the Expressive Attitude of Skepticism can, on occasion, slide into Idealism but also into any other of the Attitudes such as the Moving Attitude of Realism, for instance. In this case, the Skeptic who borrows from Realism will kind of ‘stack’ the Realism on top of the Attitude of Skepticism the personality uses primarily: seeing reality clearly, but through a lens of skepticism— being skeptical about the motives of the other people involved, for instance.
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Cynic [5%]
While rereading this material in prep for this post, I was struck by something: There is a comedic novel series written by Donald Westlake. Called the Dortmunder Series, it’s about a gang of thieves that can’t shoot straight.
The primary character, John Dortmunder is the classic cynic.
He’s a brilliant strategist who can plan a burglary to the finest detail. And, he can pull it off—up to a point. And then it goes wrong— in some hilarious way. John doesn’t see the humor, of course. But the reader does. =D

But, here’s the point: John just plods along through a gray lifetime in a gray world always expecting the worst. He distrusts everyone; he even distrusts good fortune when it [rarely] puts in an appearance. He’s always waiting for the other shoe to drop. When it does he’s likely to say something like, “Oh, yeah, that’s right,” and then just go on as if nothing had happened. He’s not at all surprised that, in the end, it all went wrong.
Even so, he never gives up— as in THE HOT ROCK when he steals the same emerald 5 times [along with a few other crimes thrown in for good measure] before finally getting his hands on it—only to lose it again.
[After noticing how well Dortmunder is outlined here, I began hunting for the other characters in the books to see if I could pinpoint their Attitudes. Where I can, I’ll profile them as well. If anyone else is familiar with Dortmunder and his gang, I hope you’ll add your views to mine.]
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Galloping back to my primary point here, the Cynical Attitude is chosen for protection during a highly karmic lifetime. Cynics distrust the motives of others and expect life not to work out— no matter how hard they try. Life is a bowl of cherry pits, anyway. The only thing worth focusing on is the negative.
Expecting the worst anyhow, the Cynic isn’t disappointed when it comes.
The classic ‘yes-but’-ers, Cynics will find fault with any suggestion you put out there. They will always find a reason why your idea won’t work.
They are unconventional: they disregard social institutions and will always find sufficient reason to disregard conventional wisdom.

In the positive pole, Cynics tend to root out stupidity before it goes too far. Believing that, "If anything can go wrong, it will," they’ll at least try to come up with a fool-proof plan because, according to their viewpoint, everyone is a fool, in any case.
They are not easily conned. They don’t take people at face value and are always waiting for the other shoe to drop.
In the negative pole, Cynics will scoff and jeer. Preoccupied with the negative, they become caustic and will argue for argument’s sake. Preferring to gripe rather than try to make things better— they can look pretty miserable.

Realist [30%]
Realists pay particular attention to the action going on around them.

Among Dortmunder’s colleagues, there’s a guy named Andy Kelp. At the drop of a hat, Andy will launch into a long, drawn out anecdote about a mutual acquaintance. There doesn't need to be any point to the tale— that it happened is enough to justify its telling. He may get to the end of a story and then just gaze off into the distance— barely even being aware that he has come to the end. It will take an impatient, “Get ON with it, willya?” from John to get Andy to come back to earth.
If John then brings up another topic or person for consideration, he’s likely to launch Andy into yet another yarn about the new person or topic. And John just patiently waits for Andy to wind down again.
And Andy goes in for fads. He was the first kid on his block to get a fax and a cell phone. He has managed to shoplift lots of phones and has one in every room of his apartment--even the bathroom and the hall closet. None of these phones look like your standard phone, though. Each is unique.
Andy has tried to get John to install more than the one phone in the kitchen. After all, Andy will shoplift it for him--he won't even have to pay for it. But John will have nothing to do with the idea. Once, when Andy wouldn't lay off about it, John threw the phone out a window. And Andy finally got the point.
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There’s another character who may be a Realist: Stan Murch— the driver. Ask Stan how he got here today— if you have no other plans this afternoon. Because he will tell you— in the minutest detail —the route he took and why, what streets were torn up along the way, what alternate routes he took as a result, etc. etc. etc.
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Realists are concerned with the behavior and activities of other people. They also like to be up on the trends and fashions— whatever is new on the world scene. This makes them rather conventional people, who conform to social norms and institutions [but not Andy and Stan who are, after all, petty crooks. But that’s another matter.]

Realists are also often news-hounds.

Where Cynics put a stop to what is happening, Realists are unable to put a stop to anything. Instead, they are carried along by events. If a Cynic and a Realist are discussing something, the Cynic will be brief and negative and the Realist will be verbose and positive.

Realists ramble aimlessly when they talk — they cannot come to a conclusion, or get to the point, or make a concise, definitive statement. This is a dead giveaway for detecting a Realist.

Cynics see what is wrong with the world, Realists simply see things the way they are.

The Positive Pole of the Realist Attitude is Perception. Events in life seem transparent to these folks. They see things exactly as they are, so their vision is not distorted. They regard the world as a continually interesting series of occurrences of unending variety, and they approve. If there is a meaning or a mood within the action, it is not as important as the bare event itself.
Because they perceive external events neutrally, they are rather experimental in their own lives. They also readily go along with the proposals of others. This can of course work to their detriment if the suggestions are stupid or harmful.

In the Negative pole the person assumes that everything is OK, and I do mean EVERYTHING. Since such a person sees all sides to every issue, there is little understanding of a current situation. People in this pole are unable to come to a conclusion. Every alternative is seen as equally viable, so they can be wishy-washy.
Such people are uncommitted to any particular action, so it is possible for them to be easily persuaded. They will go along with just about anything. If you ask a person in the negative pole of Realism a question to which you expect a simple yes or no answer, you will likely get a lengthy, roundabout discourse that explores every aspect of the question but which arrives at no answer.

The simplest way out of the negative pole, here, is to apply the Positive Pole of the complementary attitude of Cynicism: Contradiction. Use the inherent process of elimination to arrive at a conclusion. Start looking for things that are wrong instead of always seeing everything that is right.

Refining Ourselves— The Attitudes [2]

The Inspirational Attitudes —Stoic and Spiritualist
The Attitude is our primary life-outlook. It colors how we perceive the world and our place in it. It influences how we respond to life. Though primarily an intellectual perspective it affects how we respond emotionally, as well, and what we are most likely to do.

Stoic [5%]
Stoics can be described as the pessimistic Attitude. It isn't that Stoics perceive everything as contemptible like the Cynic does, or that they perceive everything to be questionable like the Skeptic does. It is that there is very little that is of much importance. A Stoic finds the world bland, uninspiring and drab— "Things are tough all over".
Stoicism lends patience and forbearance to the personality and can be helpful during especially trying lifetimes.

The advantage here is that Stoics are not easily upset because they can put up with much negativity. It is as if they were insulated from it. Nor are they deceived by false hopes. On the other hand, there is the disadvantage that Stoics do not "fight the system" when it is in need of reform. They may not see real dangers to avoid.

Stoics hold a certain insensitivity to what is happening around them — "Who cares?". They are psychologically "nearsighted", so to speak.
They are unaffected by things that provoke others, and indifferent to things that draw others— "So what?"
Because they tend to minimize what they see, it often takes the proverbial two-by-four hitting them between the eyes to get their attention. Only in severe trauma do they realize that something serious may be wrong.

Stoicism isn’t chosen in order to change the world. It’s chosen in order to get by. Often the choice of people born in Asia, these days, imagine how much of a help it can be in China where things have been changing so fast that, for several generations now, the only safe topic of conversation has been the weather.

The idea here is to accept what is with tranquility rather than to attempt to change things. Stoics reserve their feelings— even from themselves.

In the positive pole, you find tranquility and reserve. The underlying statement is, ‘Whatever,’ or ‘What will be will be.’ Stoics make a virtue out of necessity.
It may have been a stoic who coined the phrase about making lemonade out of the lemons life hands you.

In the negative pole, the stoic can become more and more resigned to a terrible situation. They tend to hang in there— never attempting to make anything better. They may become so exhausted they simply plod along, granite faced.

John Dortmunder MAY live constantly in the negative pole of Stoicism, fwiw.

Spiritualist [5%]
Tiny Bulcher— a monster of a man who can pick up a small car and walk away with it or grab a growling rottweiller and toss it into a closet without a second thought may be a Spiritualist.
On the other hand, he MAY be a Realist in that he tells stories though they’re more likely to be about his own actions rather than those of others. Mercifully, the reader usually comes in at the tale-end of the story —just when he is wiping the blood off the hatchet and putting it back where he found it [at the Girl Scout camp] or just after he has shown that cocky guy who swore that you can’t kiss your own elbow— how he could, after all.
But, Tiny has certain principles that are extremely important to him. Politeness, for instance. He will explain very patiently, while holding someone by the throat, exactly WHAT the guy did to merit such treatment—and, often, it’s because the guy was impolite in some way.

And, 2nd, there is a friend of Kelp’s [he has lots of friends] named Wally Knurr. A little butterball of a guy who is slightly taller sitting in a standard-sized chair than he is standing up and about as wide [Tiny has been known to say he might be fun to play basketball with—but no one has asked him precisely what he means by that].
Wally sees the best in everyone. He knows that Kelp is a thief but also understands that Kelp is, at heart, a good person. So, being the geek he is, he will, on occasion, use his computer skills to help Andy figure out how to get something he needs.

And Wally is unfailingly polite [Tiny will never need to explain that to him]. He always calls John's girlfriend 'Miss May' and says 'Thank you' when she gives him cheese and crackers.
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Spirituality is the optimistic Attitude. Remember that Attitudes reveal what perceptions people project onto the world, or what part of reality people tend to see.
Spiritualists typically see the world as improving, evolving, developing to a higher plane. They have high anticipations of it, so they tend to get upset when it does not live up to their expectancy [note Tiny’s disappointment with impoliteness]. They want to see it fulfill its highest potential. They hope there is a steady stream of progress in the future. A person in Spiritualism perceives the world as evolving toward higher realms.
Spiritualist's are far-sighted visionaries. They look down the road a long way, to see where it is all leading. They expect things to head toward a better world, a more highly evolved society, a finer place to live, a happier place and with fewer problems. Obviously there is a degree of distortion in this, because the world is at times a dreary, depressing place [just ask John], and situations often get worse rather than better.

The Spiritualist Attitude is the complement of the Stoic Attitude. That is, Spiritualists tend to lack Tranquility and Resignation. Whereas Stoics tolerate suffering well— they regard it as an inevitable part of life in the world —Spiritualists cannot understand why it exists. They hide their eyes from it when they can, and if they can't, they beseech the Deity to heal it.

Because Spiritualists tend to be hopeful and optimistic, they are subject to turmoil when reality does not live up to their expectation. Spiritualists do not easily resign themselves to reality. Instead, they tend to resist destiny/fate when it is not as noble, virtuous, or as good as they expect.
They do not tolerate bad fortune well. They will anguish in their minds and scream in their hearts— unable to serenely go along with an inferior reality. Spiritualists are the most likely to blame God for making a mistake in creating an imperfect world. [And Tiny will seek revenge against the person who brought it to his attention.]

The biggest problem of Spiritualists is that they lack peace of mind, whereas Stoics tend to have it too much of it. The world with it's many imperfections so often disappoints. Reality itself is a letdown to Spiritualists, because it does not live up to their vision of how things could be if only people would let go of all the garbage.

Spiritualists really enjoy comedy and fun. They are not always able to produce it but they do like it. And, just as they look for fun and enjoyment in the world, they also look for religious feelings.

Spiritualists have a difficult time with emotionality. They regard their feelings as part of their "lower" nature. If they have strong Emotions which include moodiness, for instance, they try to "rise above" it.

Often this Attitude gives a person an inherent interest in religion or spirituality of some kind. From an early age Spiritualists tend to have a sense that there are realms beyond the physical. Or the person may be interested in psychology— the "spiritual" aspect of people.
Another major factor among Spiritualists is their interest in ethics or morality. This comes from their perception of the world as becoming a better place, and out of their own noble aspirations. This can make them difficult to be around, as they will examine the ethics of every situation. They want to do what is "right"—and they expect the same of others. They can be surprised when other people do not share their ethical sensitivities. So, those others can perceive them as moralistic and self-righteous— Little Goody Two-Shoes.

The Positive Pole of Spirituality is Verification. This means to authenticate the truth. This is not to be understood in the sense of Investigation, the Positive Pole of the Skeptic Attitude, which means to seek out the facts. Verification means seeing the truth among the lies.
Spiritualists look for transcendent factors at work in the world. They see these grains of divine awareness among the chaff of falsehood and, in fact, ignore the lies. They focus instead on the part of the universe that is in fact evolving to higher realms. The whole cosmos is a "morality play.”

The Negative Pole is Faith. The meaning of this word should not be confused with the meaning in Christian theology— trust in God or belief in Christ or anything like that. It does not concern adherence to religious dogmas. Nor does it concern unproven beliefs of any kind, for those are more a factor of the Intellectual Centers.

This sort of Faith is a felt thing, not a thought thing. This Faith refers to wishing and hoping in an emotional sense.
As indicated above, people with this Attitude are optimistic — they expect things will turn out for the best, no matter how bad it seems in the present. If they are being unreasonably optimistic, having no cause to be so, they are denying reality and deluding themselves.
Whereas people in the Positive Pole see what is true and good in the world, People in the Negative Pole get their hopes up that a miracle will deliver them. Thus they continually set themselves up for disappointment.

To see what their fate may be, they consult astrology, tarot, psychics, tea leaves, the crystal ball, the I-Ching or whatever. These are exhibitions of Faith motivated by fear.
People in Faith may develop their own collection of superstitions. People in Faith may look to omens to foretell the future. There may be attempts to influence destiny through magick rituals, or through charms such as the rabbits foot or a Saint Christopher medal.
The passive person may just hope and wishfully think that things will turn out OK— cross your fingers and look toward the heavens.

The way to overcome the Negative Pole of Faith is to consider and apply the Positive Pole of Stoicism: Tranquility. Don't let the setbacks in life get you down. Realize that the world is not really becoming a better place. It just grinds on inexorably with both ups and downs in the process. Do not expect things to always get better or worse in the long run, because it is not the way of the world.